Thursday, May 29, 2014

Well, boo.

We just had our third (THIRD!!!) buyer fall through on our rental in San Jacinto. I'm so frustrated. I don't even care (haha, okay, maybe a little bit) if we get the place, I just don't want to be in flux anymore. I'm not so good with the whole 'patience' thing. I can pretend to be for short amounts of time, but months and months? Not so much. Maybe I should be working on it instead of sulking (duh).

There really aren't any other places with property in our price range, though. Ideally we could live in Vista or San Marcos on an acre or two and be happy, but without trying to get something on auction it isn't going to happen. I'm so mad at the whole thing I want to move to the Midwest and buy a nice place for cash. Stupid nice weather here! Ha.

I'm too grouchy to be blogging right now, I think. Just a quick update then: we're still in escrow on Querencia, but the sellers are getting impatient. San Jacinto needs to sell before we can buy it. Who knows. I trust God for the details of our lives, though I really wish I could get a printed itinerary.

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Surrender

I am.... frustrated. The escrow isn't working out on the place we have to sell because they're short 2000 dollars. $2k. Such a seemingly small amount of money in the grand scheme of house buying. Without that home selling, we can't buy Querencia. If the whole deal falls through, we'll have to find another buyer and hope that it closes in time for our escrow on Q to not expire.

I got this news from Jake yesterday after a loooooong day, and I was well on my way to misery with my terrible attitude. Then that wonderful man of mine went into the kitchen, started washing the dishes, and whistling "I Surrender All".

Damn it. Way to ruin my pity party, man.

He did exactly what what needed in that moment to soften my hard heart. Not preaching at me or making me feel stupid for feeling the way I did, just serving me with cleaning and loving me with a gentle whistle on those blessed lips. Thank God for him, you know?

Who knows if we'll still end up in Pala? I love the land, I love the area, and I even secretly love the crazy house. But I love the Lord more, and I know that He is more than capable of putting us where we need to be, whether it's there or here or wherever else on earth. Maybe our job of loving our neighbors isn't done here in Escondido, or maybe it's just one of those things that we'll never see how the threads make sense until we see the whole tapestry someday.

That said, I'm still really disappointed. We went up there last weekend to see if the crazy winds had broken anything, and we climbed the big rock under the big oak tree in the middle of the property.
This is the view

This is the tree and the rock.
I'm like a love-sick teenager thinking about it all the time, dreaming about it, doodling my name in a notebook with its last name... Okay, maybe not that last one. But I love it. And I even love the ridiculous weeds that cover every inch of it. 
Did I say weeds? 

I mean lovely things in hard places...

...for shade and shape and softness. 

Whatever happens, God is good and faithful to us, and we trust Him to lead us where he would have us go. I just reeeeeeally really hope it's here. If you'd like, you can pray with us that our other house will sell, that our timeline doesn't compromise the escrow, and that when all of that happens the inspections will make the bank happy and make us happy, with no new septic tank or roof needed. Either of those things will kill our entire renovation budget. Oh, and if the well water is bad, that's a complete deal breaker for us, so we're praying for that, too.

The Lord knows whats up.

All to Jesus, I surrender;
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In His presence daily live.


I surrender all, I surrender all,
All to Thee, my blessèd Savior,
I surrender all.